What is Breakup Therapy?
Heartbreak is more than sadness—it can feel like your identity, future, and sense of safety have been pulled out from under you. Breakups can open old wounds, bring up attachment patterns, and leave you questioning your sense of self and belonging. Therapy creates space to heal.
Whether you were dating casually, navigating a situationship, in a long-term relationship, or ending a marriage, your heartbreak deserves care. As a breakup therapist, I support people in all stages of breakup healing—whether you’re in the immediate shock and overwhelm of a fresh ending or struggling with pain that feels like it won’t quite let go. Together, we’ll honor where you are and work toward healing, integration, and new possibilities.
How Breakup Therapy Can Help
In breakup therapy, I create a supportive space for you to:
- Process grief, heartbreak, anger, relief, fear, and the messy mix of emotions
- Organize thoughts and feelings when they feel confusing or overwhelming
- Honor your unique pace—whether it’s been days, weeks, or years since the breakup
- Explore and address patterns from the relationship
- Learn how to make future choices with awareness
- Rebuild confidence and self-trust
- Reflect on yourself, your needs, and your values
- Make space for future relationships and desires, when you feel ready
- Reconnect with your sense of self
There is no timeline for healing. Breakup therapy supports you in your process—helping you move forward with more clarity, self-compassion, and steadiness.
Kat Tan, Associate Marriage and Family Therapist, #160704
Supervised by Natalie Webster, LMFT #126065
Working With Me
I’m Kat, a therapist who helps people reclaim their sense of self in the aftermath of relational pain, burnout, or major life transitions.
I utilize a variety of exercises—drawing from CBT, somatic experiencing, attachment theory, parts work, the Gottman method, drama therapy, family systems, existential explorations, and more—depending on how you processes the world. I celebrate each individual’s uniqueness, and I tailor my style to fit your needs.
I offer a space that is affirming of queer identities and supportive of neurodivergent ways of being. I’m a graduate of Pacifica Graduate Institute and offer sliding-scale rates to support accessibility.
Common Themes I Support
I offer online telehealth therapy for individuals and couples across California. Breakup therapy is focused on the individual, but I can also work with couples navigating conscious uncoupling.
- Explore identity outside relationship
- Heartbreak, grief, and loss
- Boundary work
- Unpack your history
- Advocate for yourself and your needs
- Address obsessive thoughts, rumination, or emotional spirals
- Attachment patterns
- Build confidence
- Navigate anger or betrayal
- Connect to your desires
- Integrate relationship lessons into future choices
Testimonials
“I felt lost and alone after my breakup, but therapy with Kat helped me feel confident in starting the next chapter of my life. I feel wiser, more self-assured, and more grounded.”
– Former Client, Mel B.
“Kat is amazing! She helped me feel empowered after a really hard break up. Through our work, I was able to see my own patterns of self sabotage. I learned how to be more compassionate with myself and choose new habits for healthier relationships — with myself, my friends, and in dating.
– Former Client, Lauren O.
Therapy with Kat 